London Calling

All the money, and all the luck. That’s not how my mum told me it was going to be! ‘Rich or lucky’ she used to say.

Chelsea, Chelski, Chavski, CSKA Fulham. Personally I’ve always called them Shankers (short for Shed End … well you can work it out) but whatever you call them they’ve got all the money and all the luck.

Maybe it’s their destiny, because in many ways money was the root objective in the formation of the club, unlike the majority of clubs who were formed by groups of workers or members of other organisations. Not them though, they were probably the first club ever formed as a commercial exercise. In case you don’t know the story goes like this:

In 1905 there was a stadium called Stamford Bridge. It was one of the most impressive stadiums around but although it had staged the odd football match (and cricket, polo, and many other sports) it had primarily been used as an athletics stadium over the years. Football, however, was drawing fans away from other sports in their droves and the athletics company that owned it went bust. Seeing a chance to make money the Mears family bought the place and contacted local club Fulham with a view to them renting the ground. Fulham said no, as did other clubs who were approached and so the new club of Chelsea was formed, with a formidable budget. Purely on the money spent and the prestige of the ground they were immediately elected to the Football League (without having even played a friendly). 100 years on they’re trying to demonstrate that you can still buy what you want in football. But getting all the luck?

Why the mini rant? Well I didn’t go to the game so if you saw it on tv there’s not a lot I can add in terms of the actual match. I watched it in a pub up here, with about a dozen Gooners, a couple of chavs, and a couple of dozen barcodes who (although it doesn’t effect their end of the table) obviously find them as distasteful as we do. A bad game they didn’t lose because we didn’t get the cast iron pen we should have, and they won due to some outrageous luck from an offside player. Neither team deserved to win (or even score for that matter) but from the reaction afterwards you’d have though they’d spanked us 6-0!

I’ve heard people on phone ins saying that Wenger’s lost the plot and has to go, that Henry needs dropped, we’re not even going to get into Europe next season! The same has been on website forums, in the papers, basically everywhere. People really need to get a grip! If is a big word but if we’d got (and converted!) the spot kick it would have drawn them out and given Henry space to exploit. We could easily have won by 2 or 3 because even without the goal for 5 minutes in the second half their defence looked shakier than the shakiest thing in shakyland.

Before I move on from that game I must mention something. I tend not to go to the aways in London any more because, frankly, sometimes I need a break from all the travelling. Stamford Bridge is different. I stopped going there a few years before I moved up here because of the outrageous prices they charged us for a restricted view. If I remember right their crummy tickets were in the mid £30’s when no other aways cost more than about £25. They were certainly expensive enough for myself and many others to stop going.

So on to Fulham at home. I’d travelled down the day before in sunshine but by the time I woke up on Wednesday the weather had turned miserable and rainy. The horrible weather you only get in cities (oi – any more Aussie gloating about weather and I’ll mention the cricket!) that makes the grime look even grimier didn’t help the mood around the ground. Frankly, the whole place seemed deflated, even though the rain fortunately abated for around an hour before and after the game.

Nipped up to the box office to pick up tickets for Middlesborough and I don’t think I saw one smiling face. Even the ‘Arsenal Credit Card’ people didn’t have any new freebies – just the same print as last week! I like freebies, as ticket prices have gone up they’ve somehow become more important to the point that I had to have one of the O2 hats being given away (not that I’ll ever wear it) and lots of their lollies. The credit card people are different. Sign up for an Arsenal branded credit card and you get a free gift on the spot. An Arsenal one. And it’s not like you have to give a real name now is it! So we always sign up if we’ve time and have a nice selection of Arsenal hats (which I do wear) and some other bits and pieces.

Then it’s off to the main entrance to meet a friend of my brothers who was using his ticket. Now some people find the ‘meeting strangers’ thing a bit worrying but as I’m 6ft4 and have a number of, er, distinctive hats picking a spot and letting them find me has always worked fine, as it did this time.

Very little in the way of security compared with the Newcastle game. Quick pat of the bag and I was in. Seemed strange, until I later found out that some areas of the ground that hadn’t had a major search before the Newcastle game had a much tougher search this time. I guess it makes sense to keep people on their toes like that and the club seem rightly reluctant to discuss security plans for up coming games.

Inside the ground the atmosphere was just as flat as outside. Even the players seemed different warming up. No real zip. Hardly seemed like a league match let alone a London derby. In fact the only thing I noticed of interest was that our ref was the youngest on the Premier League list and officiating his first Arsenal match. Now some may have thought of that as an opportunity to see a younger ref, me I’m just thinking ‘Another muppet to hate!’ Can’t stand refs. At all. They’re just tax inspectors that couldn’t pass their maths exams.

So the game starts and Reyes starts to twinkle from the first minute. Yup, the sunshine boy turning it on in the rain. He’s taken a lot of stick from some fans but the kid is pure class and the moment we signed him I was stuck for words to express my delight. He’s very much a free spirit in terms of the way he plays and it’s taken him a while to learn to use his talents for the best of the team but he has the talent to become one of our best ever players.

It was very noticeable how well he was playing; unfortunately it was also very noticeable how lame the ref was. New breed, old breed, all muppets! And if he was bad then the lino at the North Bank end was lamentable. Considering the amount of money sloshing around the game the standard of refereeing is an absolute disgrace and to be honest I can’t see it being too long before one is sued for incompetence – and I for one will be willing to give evidence!

We miss a pen and they score (an absolute beauty), but hey it’s Fulham! They haven’t beaten us since New Years Day 1966 and this was no different. Well apart from The Weirdo getting a couple of goals!

Pascal Cygan – match winning hero! Scoring once was a shock but getting a brace! I even got the North Bank (and half the ground) to join me in a chorus or two of ‘Walking in a Cygan Wonderland’. Other songs normally saved for more heralded players were co-opted to the cause. Even the stadium announcer, in a rare moment of humour, announced he only had 181 goals to go to catch Wrights record!

So a comfortable 4-1 and everyone left the ground happier than they entered. Well the Arsenal fans anyway. But to be honest it was a strange kind of happiness. It seemed more like the mid 80’s when amidst all the garbage there would be the odd bright spot to cherish. Two goals from Cygan just seems like such an 80’s moment, even down to Kolo and his amazing jump to get out of the way.

The defeat in chavland seemed to have affected the whole club from supporter to manager and a stroll against Fulham was just what was needed. This team has got so much going for it and I do think that this season we’ll be leaving Highbury with glory.

By the way (he says in a shameless piece of self publicity) you might like to check out the article I’ve written for Arsenal-Mania about what a real fan is. All blindingly simple really.

http://www.arsenal-mania.com/arsenal/page/articles/title/What%20is%20a%20real%20fan/article/476284/

Come on you red(currant)s!

Ps – too wet and horrible for any good photo’s so I’ve included a couple from the stadium tour I took in the summer.

West Stand from Director's box

I can do this!